The Bridesmaid's Brother by Olivia Lockhart

Author:Olivia Lockhart [Lockhart, Olivia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-09-10T16:00:00+00:00

TWENTY

We sank deliciously into a relationship which seemed to be equal parts lust and equal parts deep understanding. I was delirious about it, drunk on it, and I struggled to think of anything but Ryan.

Rocket walks became our fix of each other, as many days as we could manage around the multitude of our other commitments. Actual dates were more troublesome to arrange but we watched movies, visited a stately home and devoured scones with clotted cream and jam, and kissed at every single opportunity. Every day or night we could spend together, we did. And when our day-to-day lives didn’t allow it, we worked around it.

The illicitness of it made it all the sweeter. We’d discussed the fact I wasn’t happy for him to stay over when Lucy was with me, not yet. She was adapting to the relationship well and I wanted to keep that going, letting her adjust over time. Some nights though, we couldn’t help ourselves. I’d message Ryan once Lucy was asleep; she’d always been a deep sleeper, very rarely would she wake overnight. I’d leave the front door on the snib and head into the living room, where the curtains would be drawn, and the lights dimmed.

Soon after, Ryan would gently tap on the front door and everything else was forgotten. How bad the day had been, how tired I was, how many jobs I still had to do, or what a mess the kitchen was. Nothing mattered from the moment his fingers tangled in my hair until the second he withdrew from me, breathless, hot and so ridiculously happy. Then I’d be ushering him out, all kisses and giggles, before I locked up with a sickeningly smug smile.

On the nights that Lucy was with her dad, I’d sometimes stay at Ryan’s house. I’d been apprehensive the first time; after all, it was where he’d lived with Tara, but he made me feel so at home, so wanted, so secure, I needn’t have had a doubt. Plus, he doted on Rocket, who was also always welcome.

There were days, inevitably, when Ryan was quiet, almost on edge. It seemed to build up as his counselling appointments became due, and then afterwards he’d be exhausted, drained, before the next day returning to ‘my’ Ryan as I thought of him.

We still talked about Tara a lot. I didn’t want him to ever feel that that part of his life had to be put away or closed off, far from it. A new chapter beginning shouldn’t ever stop the previous chapters from existing, the past shouldn’t be overwritten.

Lucy had never been the type to divulge what happened at her dad's place, she didn’t keep anything from me, but neither did she overshare. I’d always thought of it as a positive sign that she was well-adjusted to the 50/50 custody split. I should have known Ryan would be mentioned at some point to Simon, though, and that he’d have questions. It probably would have been wise to have spoken to Simon earlier, but he had been nowhere near the top of my ‘to do’ list for years now.

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